My Met Gala Sunday Runway — Mary Kay Holmes

With our Lyft driver on the way to the Met Gala…my gorgeous hunk of a date was too shy to be in the photo.

There are days when you wake up and wonder what the hell you are doing with your life so you drop everything and go for a walk. As much as I hate to admit it, these little mental health walks work. Gross.

Today is Sunday, the baby Jesus’ day of rest as many consider it, and is often filled with laundry, groceries, and other exciting weekend chores. Today, however, I decided I was too tired and disinterested so I’d head outside to get the blood pumping and then do some writing instead.

I grabbed my phone and earbuds, pushed play on my latest book, and walked out into the gloomy day. As I waited at the stoplight, I discovered I was wearing a bit of a crazy outfit that consisted of bright fuchsia floral workout pants, a giant black and orange tie-dyed hoodie, gray socks, and peachy Hoka sneakers. “Who cares?” I thought to myself. After all, I was loading up my pedometer and avoiding my to-do list…not attending the Met Gala.

Toward the end of my walk, as I strolled up a neighborhood block, I noticed a tiny girl in the distance enthusiastically waving at me. I returned the gesture, then suddenly thought a parent or friend was probably walking behind me. That familiar feeling of horror gripped me as I recognized I probably just embarrassed myself. Slyly, I turned over my shoulder, expecting to find another snickering adult, to discover that no, she was indeed waving at me.

I clicked my earbud, pausing the book so I could hear the little one as her lips were moving dramatically and she was hopping up and down. So adorable, she couldn’t have been more than four, a little shimmery backpack clinging to her as she held a soft velour bear in her arms.

In the distance, I heard her mother from the porch saying, “Come on!”

The little girl replied, “But Mommy there is a lady in pretty pants!”

I smiled, glad she appreciated the pants that made me look like I’d walked off the set of Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar.

As I got closer she loudly exclaimed, “I love your pants! I love your shoes! AND your fingernails, wow! You look beautiful!”

I stopped when I reached her and said, “Why thank you so much, that’s very kind of you. What’s your little bear’s name?”

The little girl suddenly got shy and hugged her bear, silent.

From the porch, her mom said, “Puff Puff.”

I looked at her and smiled reassuringly so she wouldn’t think I was some random weirdo talking to her child on the sidewalk.

“Judy Budy,” she suddenly exclaimed, renaming the bear and holding it up for me to see.

“Wow, that’s a great name,” I replied.

She looked me up and down, taking in my pants with eyes that made me feel like I was indeed on my way to an epic New York fashion event.

“So pretty,” she whispered to herself in a bit of a trance, then smiled up at me.

“It was really nice to meet you,” I said to the tiny queen who had made my whole day, then waved at her mom on the porch.

“Bye!” she yelled before running into the house.

As she reached her mom I heard her say, “I can’t believe it! So pretty! I love it!” before the door closed behind them. Maybe she should be a red carpet commentator, sharing her thoughts on each person’s outfits as they strolled past her and smiled. I’d watch that.

I chuckled to myself and restarted my audiobook as I continued along the block in the overcast gloom. After a moment I realized the narration no longer fit my mood and switched to the new SZA album instead. Much better.

After my brief encounter with the teeny fashionista, something inside me had changed — I walked a little taller, smiling to myself as the cloudy day seemed to melt away into the background. I was the main character in my own story, strolling toward destiny, a world of possibility ahead of me.

Singing the magical words of “Kill Bill” a new vigor hit me and I imagined myself stepping up the epic steps of the Met Gala, photographers calling my name from every angle. Now, I just needed to imagine my favorite arm candy escorting me as the tabloids blew up around us. I bet he’d smell AMAZING, his smile the only one I was able to pull into focus among the sea of beauty.

I did it all for love, I did it all on no drugs, I did all of this sober…